I might be able to give up on recouping my own wedding gift money, but it's hard to give up on my parents' gift money, which is several to dozens of times more than mineโplus it's impossible to convince them.
And honestly, a wedding isn't my event; it's a 'flexing my kid' event for the parents. (The bride and groom's guests combined don't even make up half the total). More importantly, realistically speaking, if your parents have been socially active, unless the wedding is insanely flashy, the parents' gift money >= typical wedding costs. Plus, 'small weddings' aren't even that cheap in reality.
"The community agrees that Korean weddings are more about parental social obligations and 'recouping the investment' than the couple themselves, mixed with some self-deprecating humor about being single."
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