Seriously, don't join these matchmaking agencies. When I first started, the gender ratio wasn't that bad, but these days, they barely take men in their 20s, and there are almost zero women in their 20s. For the 30s-40s group, it's like 70% men and 30% women. See the imbalance? The problem is the marketing. They blast ads saying they have tons of young, pretty female members to bait the guys... since men are more profitable for them. But like I said, the ratio is off. To make matches happen, they use female part-timers as decoys. Honestly, it's basically a scam. You get matched with a decoy, get rejected over and over, and they tell you to spend more money for 'premium' service... Some people drop out, while others hold on until they've spent a fortune, and that's when they finally introduce a real woman. Of course, the top-tier guys with looks and money get real intros right away, but that's a tiny minority. You might think it's fine for women then, but nope.
First off, not all women coming to these agencies are looking for a 'meal ticket.' There are fewer of those than you'd think. When I first started, there were quite a few 'pretty but doing nothing' types, but they've disappeared. I haven't seen any this year. Instead, everyone looks at physical appearance now, regardless of gender. The average criteria for women are: similar salary, similar background, no hair loss, 175cm+ height, decent looks, and within a 1-4 year age gap. Honestly, there aren't many good-looking guys in matchmaking agencies. It used to be easier when it was just matching pretty women with rich men.
So what do they do now? They use male decoys too. They run the women around in circles. They introduce a good-looking part-timer but set his 'profile' to have a similar or slightly lower income than the woman. Most women end up liking him, but since he's a decoy, the agency tells her, 'The gentleman felt it wasn't a good match.' After getting rejected by 3 or 4 guys like this, their self-esteem hits rock bottom. They start thinking, 'Wow, I guess I'm not that popular in the marriage market.' That's when we swoop in: 'We have someone who's a bit lacking in looks but has a great personality and earns well. Want to meet him?' 80% say yes. 20% just quit. Either way, the agency doesn't lose money because the female members' fees cover the cost of hiring the decoys.
Anyway, for that 80% who say yes, we start matching them with real male membersโafter their self-esteem has been crushed. If they actually get married, we hook them up with partner wedding vendors and take a fat commission from that too.
That's basically the system. I got so disillusioned (hyeonta) that I quit. You might ask, 'Why'd you stay so long? Have you no conscience?' but it wasn't like this at the beginning. Back then, marriage felt mandatory, so we had plenty of members. We used decoys only for people who had zero self-awareness... but as the years went by, the member count dropped by half. Honestly, while there are more men than women, the total number of members has just plummeted. With decoys eating up the budget, the company's revenue tanked and salaries got cut... My company wasn't even a small firm, so I bet other places are in the same boat.
I ended up becoming a job seeker, so this turned into a bit of a rant, but I felt like I should be honest since I'm out of that world. I'm sure there are some ethical places out there, right...? If you're thinking of joining, make sure to do your research thoroughly.
"An industry whistleblower exposes how matchmaking agencies use fake 'decoys' to gaslight members into lowering their standards just to secure a commission."
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